There’s a lot constantly going in the fantasy part of our minds that sounds pretty strange and at times, frankly, shocking. But coming to terms with our fantasies – and realising they are not our reality – belongs to the art of knowing how to live more easily with ourselves. Enjoying our Youtube videos? Get full access to all our audio content, videos, and thousands of thought-provoking articles, conversation cards and more with The School of Life Subscription: https://t.ly/4bvm7 Be more mindful, present and inspired. Get the best of The School of Life delivered straight to your inbox: https://t.ly/zMkYn FURTHER READING “Every day, each one of us entertains, in the caverns of our minds, a host of secretly very enjoyable but deeply taboo ideas and scenarios. We fantasise about the downfall of rivals, sudden wealth and fame, reversing and accelerating time, eliminating colleagues, anticipating the stock market, the death of various people (even a few we’re meant to love) – and of course, of having sex with a huge variety of entirely inappropriate people in a plethora of highly forbidden or just pretty non-standard ways…” You can read more on this and other subjects here: https://goo.gl/8gl7fb MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Watch more films on SELF in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLself SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ X: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Emma Ehrling http://www.emmaehrling.co.uk/ #TheSchoolOfLife

Despite talk of liberation, our sexual lives remain the focus of immense amounts of shame. One way to deal with this is to expand - with dignity - evidence of what people are truly like. Here, some brave individuals reveal what it is they deep down want and think about. We applaud their courage, and find it poignant too. Enjoying our Youtube videos? Get full access to all our audio content, videos, and thousands of thought-provoking articles, conversation cards and more with The School of Life Subscription: https://t.ly/t9acs Be more mindful, present and inspired. Get the best of The School of Life delivered straight to your inbox: https://t.ly/ghYC8 FURTHER READING “From adolescence onwards, one of the great struggles we face is how to reconcile our desire to be normal and good with the contents of our sexual fantasies. For most of us, there are some alarming bits of our imaginations that simply refuse to fit in with the rest of our allegiances: we may be deeply interested in monogamy, and yet after a while, could find that we are only excited by the attention of complete strangers. We may be believers in every kind of gender equality, yet in bed, dream of humiliating someone. We perhaps want to be strong and competent, but are drawn to sexual scenarios in which we’ll be ordered to follow a master or mistress around on a chain on our hands and knees...” You can read more on this and other topics here: https://goo.gl/ex9WXH MORE SCHOOL OF LIFE Watch more films on RELATIONSHIPS in our playlist: http://bit.ly/TSOLrelationships SOCIAL MEDIA Feel free to follow us at the links below: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theschooloflifelondon/ X: https://twitter.com/TheSchoolOfLife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theschooloflifelondon/ CREDITS Produced in collaboration with: Chloë Ellingson http://www.chloeellingson.com #TheSchoolOfLife

The disclosure of sexual fantasies can play a vital role in both the sexual satisfaction, and relational satisfaction of one’s romantic relationship. This talk explores what sexual fantasies look like, and the possible benefits involved with acting out and communicating one’s favorite or most recurring sexual fantasy. Mike Anderson received his master’s degree and doctorate in communication studies at the University of Kansas. Mike’s thesis and dissertation both examined the taboo topic of sex in romantic relationships. He has been published in magazines, newspapers, academic books, and academic journals including the Journal of Sex Research. In graduate school he hosted a radio show on KJHK that featured sex and relationship advice. The show was called “Kansas in Heat.” Currently Mike is the host and principle writer of a late night television talk show in Kansas called the Not So Late Show. Since it began in 2011 the show has won several awards. In 2012 Mike was named by Reader’s Digest as the “Most Interesting Character in Small Town America.” This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at http://ted.com/tedx